Five Reasons Women Don't Want Sex
The Kinsey Institute found that among married couples, 13 percent have sex just a few times a year, 45 percent have sex a few times a month, 34 percent have it two or three times a week and seven percent have it four or more times per week. However, what constitutes as "not enough" sex varies from couple to couple and depends on what each partner wants.
A woman may lose her libido and thus the desire to have the amount of sex that is ideal for her and her relationship, and this can be for many reasons. Putting in a little bit of effort to understand the reasons why women don't want sex can go a long way towards solving any underlying problems. Here are five reasons that might be behind a loss of desire for sex.
1. Fatigue: Common but Avoidable
Being too tired is a common reason why women don't want sex, especially if they are busy with children or a demanding job. Without the right amount of energy, you won't be up for the physical exertion and effort that sex can entail. Fatigue can even prevent you from becoming sexually aroused in the first place. Aside from reducing your libido, insufficient sleep can increase your risk of many medical conditions, including obesity, depression, diabetes and cardiovascular disease. It's crucial to make sure you get enough sleep every night. Adults should get seven to eight hours of sleep per night, but if you find you need even more, go for it. There are some simple things you can do to improve your sleep quality so that you wake up feeling even more refreshed. These things include:
- Make sure your room is completely dark, as any light will interrupt your sleep or reduce your sleep quality. A comfortable temperature is also important; most people sleep best when the room is on the cooler side.
- Go to bed at the same time every night, and get up at the same time every morning. A regular sleep schedule is important for optimal sleep quality.
- Avoid eating large meals before bedtime.
- Don't keep TVs or computers in the bedroom as the bright light emitted by these will stimulate your body to stay awake.
2. Women Don't Want Sex Because They're Bored With It
Both men and women can grow bored with their sex lives, even if the sex itself is alright. This is especially true in long-term relationships. When the novelty of a new sexual relationship has worn off, it is common that women don't want sex, as they already know exactly what to expect. Sexual boredom can by easily counteracted by trying new things on a regular basis. You could try new positions, locations, sexual acts, sex toys, or erotic media with your partner. There are endless possibilities, so there's no reason to settle for boring sex.
3. Sexual Intimacy Requires Trust
Without solid trust in a relationship, intimacy cannot exist. This is important because, in general, women place more importance on the emotional aspects of sex. If a woman's partner has broken her trust recently, it can take a long time for that trust to rebuild, and in the meantime, she might not be up for sex as often. This can be especially true if she suspects that her partner is cheating on her, which can be one of the worst forms of betrayal for many people.
4. Hormone Imbalances Easily Affect Sex Drive
Many types of hormone imbalance could spell disaster for a woman's libido, including imbalances in testosterone, estrogen, and cortisol. Healthy lifestyle measures can make a huge difference toward balancing hormone levels. Eat a healthy diet, exercise regularly and get enough sleep. There are some prescription medications such as birth control pills that can reduce sex drive for some women. Talk to your doctor about switching medications if you think one that you take has reduced your sex drive. You can supplement these measures with natural herbal supplements, such as maca root and ginkgo biloba that are proven to balance hormone levels and increase libido.
5. A Fear of Intimacy Will Drive a Woman Away
As mentioned earlier, women often find the emotional aspects of sex to be extra important. Fear of intimacy could be caused by past trauma, emotional abuse, or failed relationships. If a woman is afraid of intimacy, she'll have trouble connecting with her partner enough to enjoy sex to the fullest. For those that have a serious fear of intimacy that is detrimental to their lives, psychotherapy can be of help.